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Author Topic: What Shadows Break (Jaade-Cantina epilogue)  (Read 148 times)

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Offline SivWysan

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What Shadows Break (Jaade-Cantina epilogue)
« on: 12/09/17, 10:42:35 PM »
Maerin steps out of her skycar, entering her and Caben's old home for the first time in many nights. A part of her had been avoiding home, avoiding the memories and also the emptiness. And also avoiding the guilt, of living in luxury far above those below, pulling at her so heavily since the war's end.

Emotions flowed through her, felt like a dam about to burst- yet also a strange, unexpected clarity. She strode straight to her quarters, seeking she knew not what. Her eyes fell upon familiar sights, as she wandered to the window, staring out into the night, then back around her quarters. 

They landed on Green robes... memories of old Masters who given them, many years ago, those aged Corellians who had urged her on against her will not to run from her gifts, comforted her as much as she would let them after the loss of her family and confidence to that damned insane Sith, then stood by her when she sought to leave both her marriage, then Corellia to follow that Jedi path...

She had always walked in shadow, or so she thought, claiming its ways and wisdom for outflanking and out-thinking the enemy. And yet, as her eyes fell on those robes, she perceived how naive her time here had been before Zakuul, how many ways she had allowed pride and childish ambitions to cloud her purpose.  How she wearied now of Hutt diplomacy, fancy Watch-woman titles, showing herself off like a strutting fan-bird or nerf in heat. 



Tonight had brought back many painful memories, not just those desperate years, but pinpointing how that deep betrayal just before it that had shattered their lives on Coruscant.  She felt anger burn at Jaade- at first in the expected ways, but now.. something unexpected. She realized with surprise that the anger earlier tonight had in some way purged her, cleansed her like purifying fire. She could see now how his blind, callously foolish vendetta had slammed not only into the Temple, but into her own illusions. It had laid bare what mattered most, in some sense been almost prophetic in setting her on her path of shielding the Jedi children, flying back madly through the Unknown Regions to reach them as the Watch flew astray, and ultimately become a refugee herself as war and terror on a scale imagined again visited the Core.   

She walked over, and touched the robe.  She had left it off, at first unconsciously, then purposefully, since the terrible years of running and hiding had culminated in another horrific series of attacks on her Core home-worlds.  She'd been mourning- but also carrying more darkness than she realized.  She wondered, pensively what each robe represented, what she should carry and what she needed to leave behind.   

She had, if she was honest with herself been unsure if she would ever take off the black, what of that old life was left to her when she walked in that cantina.  She'd returned here for unfinished business, to help those Below she'd neglected as the Galaxy fell to chaos, but guilt weighed as she imagined what they'd been through in the resource collapses.  or what might lie ahead, if resource-greedy Hutts decided to rummage around the basements of this world to fuel their lusts in nearby systems.  She had been pondering what it might mean to truly join their struggle, and if there was any way out of that alive. And if that really bothered her. 

But now, through that blasted, rage-maddened wreck of a man, she'd see a mirror on herself.  She decided he wasn't the only one redemption mattered for... and wondered if there might be a way past, or at least through the shadows she wasn't seeing.

But that, for another day.  For tonight, she finally pulled the green robe around herself, and curled up to sleep blissfully dreamless until mid-morning.   

« Last Edit: 12/09/17, 10:45:48 PM by SivWysan »